School for Zak
by mythamagica
Summary: Zak Saturday, your average 11-year-old kid fighting evil and protecting cryptids, a.k.a. animals that are not supposed to exist, according to science. Now, he has to survive school. How will he do it? Zak at School and HP X-over drabbles and ficlets.
1. Oh no, its MATH!

Hello, this is my story on Zak Saturday going to school. I intend to make this as readable as possible, and to include absolutely no romance. I have seen so many Zak going to school stories with romance, and frankly, though I have no complaint with romance, i crave diversity, like how the earth needs diversity. Cliches are good, and diversity is good. Dont run away, just because I said there is no romance, read it, then run away if you must. oh, and just so you know, I'm not sure how or if I will continue this.

* * *

Zak sighed. He couldn't believe that his parents had even thought about sending him to school. SCHOOL! He had spent every year of his 11-year-old life surrounded with cryptids, and danger, and science-y stuff, and frankly, he enjoyed it. It was fun, he could see cryptids, and he could find out more about his powers. He liked all of that and, no, he did not need to 'spend time with other kids his age' as his mom, Drew, put it. The last two kids who were his age he spent time with were not fun. The alien freak, Francis, sent a bunch of space jellyfish on them, and Whadi kept on stealing his belt. He couldn't help but wonder: 'what did she want with my belt anyways?!'

"Zak Saturday" the teacher called, but of course, Zak was thinking about the problems with other kids he met. "ZAK SATURDAY!"

That caught his attention. With a start, he yelled, "What, are we under attack?" temporarily forgetting that at school, cryptids weren't attacking/being attacked a lot. At least, not as far as he could see.

His statement had made the class laugh. Whether they were laughing at him or with him, he didn't know. Judging by the guy next to him clapping him on the back while laughing, "Good one!" he would have to say that they were laughing with him.

The teacher was not amused. She continued, "Answer the question. How do you find the area of a trapezoid?" They had not yet been taught this, and the teacher wanted to see if anyone knew the answer, so she was surprised that he answered exactly, although briefly, and looking decidedly bored.

"Very good, Zak. Where did you learn this? Did they teach you early at your other school?" the teacher questioned, assuming that he, like most other kids at school, had attended school for all his life.

"What are you talking about?" Zak asked, "I was home-schooled until this moment, but my parents said that I needed to get to know other kids."

Everyone was fascinated by this: so fascinated that they forgot that this particular kid was the same kid who answered the math question correctly. By now, everyone was clamoring around, trying to ask Zak a question, and the teacher, who just recovered from a sore throat, tried vainly to call everyone back to order. Zak was wishing that she had: it's not that he didn't like the attention, he was like any other kid, but they were all talking over each other, and he was left wondering, 'how come I can understand Fisk so easily, but not these people?' Finally, he had enough, so he yelled, "One at a time people! Its not like I have five heads!"

Eventually, all the kids were quiet, and one person asked, "What is home-schooling like? Do you get to wake up at noon and everything for lessons?" clearly expecting to hear how great it was to sleep in and not have PE. (Yeah, right. With all that jumping and dodging, he doesn't need it.)

Sighing, Zak replied, "Not exactly, it's a little different. My dad is really good with math and science, so I have to learn all that stuff. And my mom knows 31 different languages, so she started teaching me some." He sighed, "Not fun when she says I have to spend the whole day speaking in some random language."

People were asking him more questions, which Zak tried to answer truthfully while not including the cryptid-related adventures, or any adventures, when finally, one girl asked the thing everyone wanted to know. "Why's your hair like that? Did you dye it, or bleach it?"

Everyone was practically sitting on their hind legs, begging to know, and were surprised when he answered, "I don't know, its natural." There was a small silence, and everyone started laughing, except a few quiet students and the teacher. Now, rather than looking upon him with awe at being home schooled, they were laughing at him and calling him old, since in their mind, white hair=old. The laughter eventually died down, and the teacher found a bull-horn someone gave her as a present, and spoke through it to get the students to quiet down and listen. Eventually, everything died down, and Zak Saturday waited for recess.


	2. recess pieces

Just a side note, these are drabbles. Meaning that no chapter correlates to the next. I am hoping that you guys will still read it, and if you want, tell me how to fix it up and make it better.

Disclaimer: If I owned The Secret Saturdays, they would all have personalities like sticks. Seeing as they don't have personalities like sticks, I will have to assume that I don't own The Secret Saturdays. :D (this is not because i am mean, this is because i forget that people are different from me...)

* * *

The bell rang. The screeching, blaring, ear-drum killing bell that signaled recess. Every kid in the classroom, including Zak, jumped up and ran to the door, though with varying levels of excitement. For a hyperactive 11-year-old crime fighting, cryptid befriending kid like him, the lull of elementary school was even worse than normal. Even worse, his teacher would not let him sleep. So, understandably, he ran outside as fast as possible and called out to Zon, before remembering that he was "not allowed to scare any innocent people with Zon, or Fisk, or Komodo. Remember, they don't know about these things, and she's supposed to be extinct" and so on by order of parents.

As a result, Zak decided to just sit on the swings. He saw one open, and he sat, swinging up and down, up and down. Eventually, he got high enough on the swing (meaning near parallel to the ground) and saw some other kids jumping off the swings. Finally finding some excitement in the droll school, he mimicked them, but due to reflexes, ended up doing a double flip before landing gracefully like a cat. He landed, and dusted himself off, aware of the awed children all around him and looking pleased with himself.

"That was amazing!" one girl said. "How did you do it?"

Zak shrugged, trying to act nonchalant. "I dunno, I just did it, I guess." What he couldn't tell them was that he had so much training with this that the reflexes were a part of him. He flies; he flips (if he can).

Unbeknownst to him, another kid was attempting to flip off the swings. As any 11-year-old kid thought, if someone did something cool, then you had to be able to do it too. When Zak turned around, therefore, he saw a kid getting ready to flip out of the swings, a kid who, no doubt, had absolutely no battle reflex training whatsoever.

"No, stop!" Zak called. However, the kid had already tried to flip off of the swings, and was now flying through the air, screaming in panic. More reflexes popped in, and Zak managed to catch the kid before he ended up splattered on the ground.

Once he put the kid down, Zak asked, "Are you ok?"

The kid replied, "Yeah, I'm fine. But how did you do that awesome flippy-thing off the swings."

Unfortunately, the teacher heard him. "Zak Saturday, why were you flipping off the swings? For your own safety, you should not do that, that's why we have rules here. To the principal's office!"

"What?!" Zak cried out outraged. "How is it my fault? I didn't even know about that rule. And I caught the kid who nearly fell too!" This had no effect whatsoever, and he was led off to the principal's office like a lamb to slaughter.

Lets Blow a Secret! Version 1:

It was recess time, and Zak was playing dodge ball with some other kids. He was doing really well, and managed to win several games, sometimes by himself. Other kids were either happy to have him on their team or slightly jealous, but of course, he had a slight advantage. That kind of stuff (dodging and aim) comes more naturally when you have to fight for your life. He suddenly stopped, however, when he heard screaming. Someone shouted, "There's a gigantic lizard trying to eat us! AHHHHH!"

More people heard the screaming, so they turned, and they saw nothing. One boy, who was the typical boy who sees himself superior to others, scoffed, "How immature, making up a story about a giant lizard." Of course, that was before he saw someones lunch eaten whole, lunch box and all, by apparently thin air. After he saw that, he ran away screaming as well.

Due to his experience, Zak not only was completely calm, but also had a pretty good idea about who the culprit was. He also knew how to handle it.

"Hey, Komodo. You're not supposed to be here, we'll get in trouble. And if we get in trouble, then you won't get hamburgers tonight…"

Komodo understood immediately, and after reappearing to nod affirmation to Zak, ran home, unaware of the fact that people were NOT used to seeing giant lizards appear out of thin air.

Zak smiled at his success, but started frowning a second later, when people started asking, "Why were you talking to the lizard? Did you send it as a prank." He didn't know what annoyed him more, the fact that they accused him of making trouble when he didn't cause it (he didn't mind being accused of causing trouble, when he did cause it) or the fact that they called Komodo a giant lizard. 'he's clearly a Komodo Dragon, duh!' Zak thought, since he couldn't tell them out loud.

Let's Blow a Secret! Version 2:

Zak was eating a snack at the lunch table that happened to be conveniently near a large tree. His snack was a cookie, which he was munching happily, happily because he didn't have to sit in the classroom anymore. He also had a bag of chips with him, which he was planning to share with someone right about…now.

"Arrwoor?" The leaves shuffled.

Zak chuckled. "Yeah, you can come down now, Fisk."

From the tree dropped Fisk, a seven feet tall gorilla-cat, a.k.a. Fiskerton Phantom, with long grey fur and glowing red eyes. He might sound vicious, but right now, he was whining slightly, and looked harmless. For now.

"Sure, you can have your chips, Fisk. Man, school has been torture. Its so boring! There's no adventures, no cryptids," *hrey!* "besides you, Fisk, and no weapons to test out!"

"Rahterskool?" Fisk asked.

"Yes!" Zak replied, sitting up at the prospect of a fun ride. "Did you build the track yet?"

"Uhruuh!"

"Awesome! I hope its as good as you say!" Just then, the bell rang. "Well, Fisk, I have to go now… Hey! Maybe there'll be a cryptid attack, and I won't have to go to school…" Zak thought wistfully.

"Rarroruu!"

"I know that won't happen, Fisk, but I can hope, right? Well, you better go, see ya!"

Right before Fisk left, a random girl ran by, looked back, and shrieked loudly. That scared Fisk, because he didn't know anyone could shriek so loudly, and he jumped into the tree, and traveled home. Zak was surprised, and ran after the girl, but she had gotten a good head start, and by the time he caught up, the teacher was looking at him suspiciously.

"Zak, Mary here claims to have seen a giant animal right next to you, one which you were talking to. Does this ring any bells?"

Nervously, Zak stuttered, "Umm, no sir. Be-besides, what would I have to do with that anyway? Maybe she imagined it?"

The teacher didn't look satisfied, but it wasn't there anymore, and he couldn't really imagine it being there in the first place. So, as a result, he had to let Zak go, although he started watching him carefully after that.


	3. Faith Aurora Hope, the Mary Sue

Please do me a favor, whoever is reading this. Read on until the end. At the beginning, it may seem cliche, but it gets better. Oh, and I'm sorry if it seems rushed.

* * *

Zak sat in his classroom, where the teacher was lecturing the class about ancient civilizations. Having seen several of these civilizations (and some of the more 'fictional' ones, like Atlantis), Zak probably knew more than the teacher. Or, he thought he did. You never really know.

Bored, he looked around the room to take in the faces of his classmates. He might as well get to know them, so if any of them turned into evil cryptid-capturing freaks and/or mean people with paranormal abilities, he would know what they looked like. As he looked around, he saw the cool-acting Cassandra, the wallflower Mary, the ADHD kid Matt, and various other people. Eventually, his eyes met with those of Faith, the mysterious girl in the class with the exotic face, eyes, and hair.

By exotic, I mean exotic. Her hair was like spun silver and gold, and was streaked with strawberry pink highlights. Her eyes were a clear purple and of course, they changed colors, so they were sometimes pink, blue, or green (however that's possible), and she had a delicate 'elf-like' face, and build. When their eyes locked, there were different reactions. Faith Aurora Hope felt her heart jump, and instantly fell in 'love'.

Zak Saturday, on his part, felt an electric, and for some reason pink, shock course through his whole being, making him convulse slightly, and he yelped in surprise and fell out of his chair.

The students (minus Faith) started laughing at his demise. Faith, however, looked concerned and asked if he was alright (Zak vaguely registered this, but didn't respond). He did notice, however, a flash of anger cross her face before it reverted back to her sweet, gentle, gracefully elfin face, and she replied, (in her totally angelic voice), "Ok, never mind."

The teacher glanced at Zak and asked, "Are you Ok, Zak?"

Zak thought for a minute. For one thing, he was fine, if a little out of it. On the other hand, he needed to think about what was going on, and he needed to contact his family. He came to a decision.

"Actually, can I go to the nurse's office?" he asked "I don't feel too great".

The teacher nodded and gave him permission, and he ran out of the classroom. Rather than run to the nurses office, however, he ran off to find a place to hide, and he called Fisk on his handy communicator, and whispered urgently, "Fisk, you need to send Zon over here right now and get me home!"

"Reoga aroo roo whee" he replied.

Knowing that Fisk had called Zon, Zak sat down and waited. Eventually, he heard a loud, bird-like call above him. Looking up, Zak could see Zon flying down from among the poofy white clouds above.

He smiled. "Hey, Zon. You think you could take me home, girl?"

Zon's response was a happy "caw", so Zak took that as a yes. Since Zon hadn't gotten the harness for Zak, he had to be content with flying around in her claws (thank goodness she was really strong).

After around 10 minutes, a lot of wet clouds, and several sore ribs, Zon and Zak landed on the platform near Zon's nest, and Zon flapped down to take a breather.

Zak, though ribs sore, ran into the house and searched for his parents. After running around and shouting really loudly, he finally found them in the inventing room, and he waited a little bit to catch his breath. When his mom noticed that he was there, she turned around and asked, "Are you ok, sweetie? And why aren't you in school? You still have another three hours of school left!"

"Whoa, Mom! This is important! Something happened in school, and I really need to tell you!" Zak cried out indignantly. "Do you really think I would just cut class for no reason."

He received incredulous stares, and a cocked eyebrow from his mom.

"Ok, ok, let me rephrase that. Do you think I would cut class for no reason, and then come home, to where you guys are?"

Doc answered, "Ok, Zak, we believe you. Now what is so important that you would actually come to us during school?"

"Ok, ok. At school, I saw this girl…" he started when Doyle walked in.

"Whoa, mini-man. You cut school to tell us about your new crush? Man, you've got it bad."

Zak groaned in frustration. "You're not letting me finish!" he shouted. "Ok, remember when we got that warning from the other secret scientists? Something about impossibly perfect and powerful beings that were actually just low-powered creations with an otherworldly contact? Yeah, I think there's one at my school."

"Seriously, you actually found a Mary-Sue?" Drew asked. "Ok, tell me. Why does all the weird stuff happen to you?"

"I don't know. Anyways, she's in my class, and her name if Faith Aurora Hope."

Doyle laughed. "Wow, you even remembered her name."

"Well, a name that flashy is memorable."

"True. Continue."

Zak complied. "Anyways, her hair is gold **and **silver, at the same time, and it's streaked with pink, but for some reason, everyone accepts it to be natural."

"Wow." Doc commented. "That really sounds like a Mary-Sue."

"Oh, it gets worse. She also looks like a fairy-tale elf, one of those from books like Eragon, where they are impossibly beautiful, and her eyes are purple. Of, even better, they change colors! I don't know all the colors, but I know they can turn green. That shouldn't even be possible!"

"Wow. We've got a real case on our hands." Drew commented. She thought, and then she replied, "Don't worry about it, Zak. Your dad and I will work on a machine to get her out of our world. Meanwhile, you'll have to keep a low profile. Don't let her know that you're on to her. Doyle can help you."

Zak, Doyle, and Doc nodded in agreement, but then Zak remembered something.

"Wait. What happens if she asks me for a date?!" he shouted.

Doyle put his hand on Zak's shoulders and laughed, "Hey, at least from the descriptions, she's pretty hot. Well, for an 11 year old."

His only response was to glare.

* * *

The next day, Zak was on the concrete sidewalk in front of the school. Knowing what was in store for him, he was a little nervous, but he took a deep breath, and he walked in the school.

Almost instantly, Faith glided gracefully up to him, and slightly nervously, with a pink blush staining her cheeks (wait, no, brushed against her cheeks, stained doesn't sound pretty enough), asked him to meet her at lunch, in the auditorium.

As Zak suspected, she had given him a lengthily speech about how she felt something different, something special about him, and how she really wanted to get to know him better, so could he please meet her on the following Saturday at the zoo, and oh, it doesn't have to be a date if he didn't want it to be.

Zak was glad she had said that it didn't have to be a date if he didn't want it to be, because he hadn't wanted it to. But still, he had to go to prevent her from getting suspicious, so he went.

* * *

After a long week, which involved two more dates, Faith officially joining him for lunch, several 'kidnappings' by a V.V. Argost (which was later discovered to be a shape shifter), and millions of hints by Faith that she had special powers, Zak had finally had it.

Thankfully, his parents finished the tech that would send her back to her world, and so they set up their plan.

The plan was simple. Get Faith, tell her to meet after school, confront her, and while she's denying everything, send her back to wherever she comes from via the portable portal.

'Ok,' Zak thought. 'Step one.'

Zak walked up to Faith, who was talking to all of her 54 friends, and whispered in her ear, "Hey, can you meet me after school? I have something to talk about."

Faith nodded, and smiled radiantly, thinking, 'Yes! He's finally going to admit he loves me! Then we can become a perfect couple!'

Of course, all of her 55 friends (she made one in the 10 seconds Zak stopped to talk to her, apparently) started talking amongst themselves, going on about how Faith was amazing, and how she would be the first girl to get into a serious relationship at the school.

One girl, who was totally and completely smitten with Zak, however, was NOT happy with the turn of events, so she marched up to Faith, and shouted, "He is not yours. He's probably going to say he doesn't want to go steady with you!"

This girl, being opposed to Faith, was of course, completely swamped by all of Faith's 55 friends trying to maim her, but Faith herself, being the kind, compassionate girl she supposedly is, told all of them, "No, it's ok. Guys stop!"

They all stopped like trained dogs, and started clamoring. "But she was mean to you!" How could she say that about you, Faith?" "How can you forgive her?" and other things like that. Faith simply said, "Guys, she's in love with a wonderful guy like Zak, how could she not be mad about it?" and they all instantly accepted this and moved on.

Zak, who had been spying on them to see how the first phase would go, smiled. Everything was going according to plan.

* * *

After school, Zak and Faith met.

'All right, Phase two' "Hey, Faith. I know a great place where we can talk in private. Come on!" and he proceeded to drag her, 'enthusiastically', all the way to a secluded pine tree forest.

As they were running, Zak obviously in the front to lead the way, Faith seemed to be deep in thought. Her actual thought were not so deep, and consisted of, 'Is he going to confess? Ooh, if he does, it's definitely going to be romantic. Maybe a lake. That's why he's taking me into a forest. Oh, I bet there's going to be a cherry blossom tree!'

Zak reached the empty clearing, and was surprised. Last he checked, the clearing had been an empty patch of dirt with a few dead trees fallen over it. There was certainly not a sparkling lake with swans on it, there was certainly no lush green grass, and there most certainly was not any cherry blossom tree, in full bloom, with the delicate pink petals floating gently in the soft breeze. He wondered to himself, 'Can cherry blossom trees even grow here?'

Faith followed, and she saw the beautiful scene. She squealed happily, "Oh, Zak! It's beautiful! It must have taken you forever to find this place!"

Zak was unresponsive, opting instead to wonder how the heck the tree, the grass, and the lake with the swans had gotten there over the course of a day. Then he remembered that Faith was a Mary-Sue, and he turned his attention back to the Sue at hand.

The Sue at hand turned to Zak and asked, "So, what was it you wanted to tell me, Zak?"

'Phase three.' Zak started, "Ok, Faith, I know about your secret…"

"Wait!" Faith suddenly said.

Zak was startled at the sudden exclamation, so he asked, "What? What's wrong?"

Faith looked solemn, and she whispered, "Even if you know, I want to tell you myself."

Surprised, all Zak could think of to say was, "Um, ok."

Faith proclaimed, "Even though you already know this, I am a shape shifter."

Zak tried to interrupt, to state that, no, she wasn't a shape shifter, but Faith was on a role. She continued on about how she could morph into any cryptid she touched (as a rip-off of Animorphs) and how she was the only one that Kur couldn't control, and therefore, she was like an incorruptible protector of Kur, but, of course, the legends about Kur got twisted, and Kur wasn't really evil, just powerful, and like a king of all cryptids. She started going on in a long and quite incomprehensible story about her whole life, from being raised by cryptids (how did she get into school?), from being captured by V.V. Argost (who had run into the Saturdays a day before, and had no idea who Faith was and why he would possibly want to capture her), to her having to get a job to fend for herself (how did she get a job if she technically didn't exist? And who the heck hires a child and doesn't get arrested for breaking the law?) and much more, which was still incomprehensible.

Finally, Zak had enough, and he shouted very loudly, "You're a Mary-Sue! You're not a shape shifter; you're not a guardian of Kur!"

Faith, shocked into silence by his outburst, was silent for a while, and said, "Why would you say that Zak? Do you not trust me?"

Zak pretended to contemplate this. After about three seconds, he commented, "Gee. What makes me think you're not who you say you are? You claim to be a shape-shifting orphan raised by cryptids, but you can still have your hair treated like that? Oh, and you really can't get a job. If you were raised by cryptids, technically, you don't exist in the political world. And there are laws against child labor. I thought I should tell you that."

Faith looked absolutely shocked. She literally froze and stopped moving, just standing there, with her absolutely shocked look on her face. Zak had just introduced something she never faced before: logic.

Doc and Drew figured, while it wasn't going exactly to plan (there was no denial of the Mary-sueness) they might as well zap her with the portable portal, and be off with her. So, they came out from behind two bushes near Zak and Faith, and zapped Faith with the portable portal, and she disappeared in a very anti-climatic and not at all amazing pop, leaving nothing by pink sparkles from her skirt sitting on the grass.

The absence of the Mary-Sue was astoundingly obvious, however, as the cherry blossom tree lost all its petals simultaneously, and swirled around, like a vortex, in an unseen wind. The cherry blossom vortex encompassed the whole clearing, tree, lake, swans, and all, and they dispersed, fading into pale dust, and settling back into the real clearing of dirt and dead trees.

Everyone just stared. Then, Doyle exclaimed, "Well, our work here is done," and they all walked away from the boring and totally unromantic clearing.

* * *

At school the next day, Zak was surprised. No one even knew Faith existed. Some of the girls in the class were talking amongst themselves. Zak heard what they said, and it made them very happy.

"Hey, what do you think is the dumbest color to streak your hair?"

"Oh, totally pink. That's the worst, definitely. I mean, pink is great for clothes, but for hair, blue is the way to go."

"Obviously." Zak smiled.


	4. Hogwarts, School of Magic: the Prologue

The Secret Saturdays and Harry Potter Crossover prologue: The Letter

Well, if you haven't noticed, I haven't uploaded for this story in a while. The reason is simple: I ran out of ideas. Of course, this proved to be a problem until I had this different idea of the famous MAGIC school, Hogwarts. ...What? Its a 'Zak goes to school' fic, I never said it couldn't be magic school. Anyways, as the title implies, this is the prologue to a series of drabbles of the Secret Saturdays/ Harry Potter crossovers that will doubtlessly take me a very long time to finish.

Now that my random tirade is over, Enjoy, and please remember that I CANT read your mind if you have any complaints.

* * *

It was a dark and stormy night.

…Ok, it was a dark night, but then again, who's heard of a bright and cheerful night? I mean, there's a difference between 'I can see' and 'wow its light out'. Anyways, in the dark night, there was a dark house, that quite honestly, looked depressing enough in the day, what with the vines and broken windows. But, the matter at hand is not the creepy house; it's the creepy man in the creepy house. His name was Voldemort, but he was also known as 'Tom Riddle', 'You-know-who', 'He-who-must-not-be-named', or 'he who must get a life'.

Continuing on, Voldemort said, in a raspy, snake-like voice, "Wormtail, I want you to get me the power of that Saturday boy. He is the only one who can control magical creatures!"

Peter Pettigrew, the small, rat-like man known as Wormtail, was kneeling at the faded carpet at Voldemort's feet.

He was obviously terrified, if the comparison of the rat didn't tell you, but he still hesitantly asked, "Um, my lord?"

"What? Can you not understand my simple instructions?" Voldemort sneered in his cold, cruel voice.

Although now stuttering and near petrified with fear, Wormtail could not be deterred; this was just bugging him to no end. "Maybe you shouldn't go after the boy…"

"What!" Voldemort snapped "You dare question my judgment? Answer me, why would you have me not go after him? He has the power to control the world if he wants to!"

"W-w-well, I was j-j-just wondering, why do you keep going after the non-wizardry powers? T-t-they keep on messing up your plans."

Voldemort, with his better judgment and curiosity, but against his natural superior-than-thou nature, only said, "Continue, Wormtail."

Seeing that he wasn't being vaporized, killed, or tortured, and that for now, he seemed home-free, Wormtail continued, "Well, remember that time you went to get that Nine-Tailed fox thing from that spiky-haired ninja?"

Voldemort nodded.

"Didn't he zap you with that weird energy-ball thing? It took you weeks to recover from that. And that 'pikachu' that belonged to that guy with the funny hat shocked you with a million volts of electricity that probably would have killed you if not for the horcruxes. After that, the guy with the hat punched you and yelled at you a lot. A-and that card captor girl with all the magic cards ended up frying you out of fright, and her friend blew you all the way to Germany with his magic sword. There was also that one time…"

"Ok, enough!" Voldemort snapped sharply, angered by the constant reminders of his failures, "Wormtail, you forget, I have learned from my past mistakes. I will capture the boy and take his powers for myself!"

And he zapped Wormtail with magic just to prove his point.

* * *

"It's great to be home!" Zak exclaimed happily while setting out food for Zon and Komodo. "I mean, living in the airship is great, but still, our home's better."

Apparently, all of the cryptids thought so too, because Fisk pretty much ran into the house with Komodo tailing him, sneaking up on his food. Zon flew to her nest and promptly began to shove her face in the food Zak had so thoughtfully left out.

Drew and Doc also walked out of the airship, carrying what appeared to be their luggage, and lots of it, while Doyle walked out with a bunch of dangerous looking energy weapons and grenades.

"Well, Zak, it's great to be home, but don't get too comfortable. The other secret scientists could come at any time." Drew warned.

"Aww, man!"

Then, Zak noticed a letter sitting innocently at the front door. Of course, when you're in the middle of nowhere, where people generally don't know you exist, that letter becomes a lot less innocent. Especially if said letter wasn't even there two seconds ago.

So, as all normal people do upon finding a letter, Zak took cover outside, shielding himself with the door-frame, and warned everybody, "Wait, something suspicious is there!"

Doc and Drew took there positions on the other side of the door-frame, while Doyle was with Zak, holding a grenade in his hand. Drew took out her fire-sword, and with her magic sword, she poked the letter, trying to see if it would blow up or move. Seeing as it did neither, they decided it was odd, but not dangerous, and Zak took up the letter.

_To: Zak Saturday_

_The big, fancy house in the forest_

'Wow' Zak thought, 'Does it really matter where we are?'

Out loud, he continued, "'Dear Mr. Saturday, we are pleased to invite you to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry…' Wow, that sounds like junk." With that, he chucked the letter in the incendiary drop (I don't think the government trash pick-up goes that far)

Another letter appeared with a soft 'pop' on the table. Of course, no one noticed this until they had packed all of the food, and Doyle decided to sit down and enjoy some ice cream. It was then he saw the letter.

"Hey, mini-man, someone left you another letter."

Zak opened up the letter, to see it was the exact same as before, so he shredded the letter in the shredder (Really, a shredder for shredding? I never knew!)

* * *

Another one appeared in the bathroom. Zak got rid of it again. And another one appeared, this time poking him in the eye because it was on his pillow. He gave it to Komodo, and told him to eat it, but when the camouflage cryptid sniffed it, he decided he didn't like it. So he buried it. After this, the family was very annoyed, and they all decided to turn in for the night.

* * *

The next morning, another letter ended up in the cereal box. Doc, who found the letter, eventually decided to collect all of the letters and take them to the target course. There, he practiced his aim on very small, moving projectiles, and managed to vaporize all of them with his new long-distance glove app, which glowed purple and shot out small peals of energy.

* * *

This time, Drew found the letter, in her bookshelf of myths and magical theories and such. She decided that the letter would be a perfect fuel source to see in enough of the fire-sword's magic rubbed off on her for her to be pyro-kinetic. Sadly, that failed, but the fire she started with the letter to see if she could maintain the flame was a very cozy fire.

* * *

It seemed as if they were free of the letters. None had appeared for the rest of the day, so they were feeling pretty hopeful. Then, Zak realized that they hadn't had a family duel in a while.

As a result, Doc and Zak were now facing each other, waiting for the signal.

"FIIIIIIIIIGHT!" Doyle shouted dramatically.

Doc and Zak proceeded to try to land a punch. Of course, as both were excellent fighters, this went on for a while. There was dodging, attacking, panting, and other fight-related things for several minutes, but no one got hurt. Finally, Doc managed to land a punch on Zak, and he flew across the room, although he did land safely in a crouch.

Suddenly, there was a really loud gun-shot-like noise, and Drew and Doyle turned to see a tall, old guy with really long white hair, a giant man who was even bigger than Doc, and a scrawny little boy who looked to be about the same age as Zak.

The old man looked calm. He might have walked in on a tea party for all he cared. The same could not be said for the other two. The giant man was very angry, and he looked about ready to break something, making both grown siblings reflexively tense, ready for an attack. The smallest boy looked terrified, but relieved that he wasn't being hit, and angry that another kid was being hit.

The boy yelled out, "Hey, you shouldn't hit kids!" then he looked amazed at his own bravery. Then, he glanced up to the big man, and had a look that conveyed, 'right, it's a lot easier to be confident with him as a friend'.

Zak, who had pounced on his father, effectively knocking him off his feet, belatedly realized that the people were there, and not having heard the boy's comment, he asked, "What, now it's the ghost of Christmas past? Come on, we see enough weird stuff already, and these guys don't even look that cool! How'd they get in here, anyways?"

The boy stared, as he realized that there were apparently no beatings going on in this household. The feeling was only intensified when guy who had thrown the punch, and was now dusting himself off after getting up off the floor, walked over to the other boy, clapped him on the shoulder, and said, "Good Job, Zak."

The guy with the long hair smiled, "See, Harry, you shouldn't jump to conclusions."

Harry's reply was a meek, "Yes, Professor Dumbledore."

Dumbledore continued, "Anyways, we've noticed that you haven't replied to your letters, so, we decided to investigate."

"Yeah, we thought it mi' be sumthin' like Harry, here, where he wasn' even allowed to open 'is letter."

Drew sighed, "You really think that we would even THINK about hurting our little boy?! Who do you think we are?"

"Ok, Mom! I'm not a little boy! I'm already 11!" Zak complained. "Besides, a magic school seems pretty cool. Right, Mom?"

Thinking about it, she sighed, "I guess it could be interesting, but we need to do more research about your problem. That's kind of more important, right?"

Dumbledore, seeing an opening, commented, "You know, Hogwarts has the biggest library in the magical world."

Zak perked up, "See, mom? A magic library would be perfect for this!"

Zak turned to Dumbledore. "They can come, right?"

Dumbledore smiled. "Of course they can."

He clapped sharply. "Great, then we can get you moved in. We will need to get all of your school supplies, so Hagrid will take you there tomorrow. "

"Wait a second!" Doc said, "We haven't agreed to anything!"

"Come on, Daaaad!" Zak whined, sounding like the little boy he claimed to NOT be. "A magic library. A Magic Library! REALLY! It's like, the solution just falls into our hands, and you're still hesitating? Pleaaaase, dad?"

Doc sighed. It really was impossible to ignore him when he wasn't trying to do something ridiculous, dangerous, or otherwise teenager-like. "Fine, but we might have to leave at any time!"

"Great! I'm going to a magic school! Fisk! Komodo! Zon! Come on, we've got to get packed!"

Sure enough, Fiskerton, Komodo, and Zon all rushed in to help him pack for who-knows-what. After Zak greeted them, they all rushed out so that Zak could pack his stuff.

Drew and Doc just looked at each other. For a second they just stood there, and shared a glance. The glance clearly said 'Of course.' They didn't even notice that the 'visitors' had been staring at them funny because of the cryptids, or that they had mysteriously disappeared.

* * *

Harry, Hagrid, and Dumbledore were Harry's hotel room, and Harry was extremely animated talking mode, because they euphemism of the whole magic thing. Dumbledore was just listening and nodding, looking remarkably like a perfectly normal old man. He did notice, however, that Hagrid was strangely quiet.

"What is on your mind, Hagrid?" he questioned, knowing that not much could make him react like that.

Hagrid thought for a few more minutes. "There was something weird about that kid; something powerful. It's unnerving, actually."

"Hmmmmm."


	5. Shopping for Wands

Hello to all of those who managed to get this far. Thanks for reading this far, and don't expect any real plot. For one thing, I actually made a plot hole the size of Texas (or the Sun) in my previous chapter. To all those who noticed that in Harry's first year, where that chapter took place, Voldemort was a ghost thingy in Quirrel's head, congratulations.

I felt the need to mention that, now enjoy the story.

* * *

Zak was ecstatic. He ran around, actually acting like a little kid, not like a supposedly evil being who was trying to fight evil and being evil, and Doc and Drew Saturday were completely fine with that. They wanted their son to live like a normal kid for once. Although…

"Mom! Check this out! These people actually fly brooms! I mean, seriously, brooms!"

Drew sighed. Even when they were acting normal, they were weird.

Doc caught the sigh and the reason for it. "You know," he commented, "These people all see this place as normal, so really, we are still considered normal."

"Yeah, I'll bet we'll find a way to stand out as different even here, in the land of people who still use brooms as transportation." Drew commented, smiling slightly.

Then, she noticed that Zak had noticed a pet store, and was quickly flitting out of sight in the large crowd. Of course, she had to follow him, because as experience told, he got in the most trouble when he was alone.

...Ok, he got in about the same amount of trouble with or without them, but at least with parents it was supervised, and didn't involve near death.

Strangely enough, nothing especially strange happened. Zak went into the store, and Doc and Drew followed. There, they all observed the creatures, occasionally noting one they recognized, under a different name. There wasn't any strange glowing, there weren't any violent creatures acting all peaceful around Zak, and there weren't any gentle cryptids trying to attack him. The only thing eventful that really happened was that the Saturdays bumped into Hagrid, who had a white owl in a cage. Eventually, they decided to meet up with Harry, so that the two new kids could shop together and stare at everything together. Finally, after staring at color changing ink and exotic twists on common games, Hagrid called out,

" 'arry! Zak! Wer goin' ta get yer wands now! C'mon."

He then looked to where they had just been. They weren't there. Doc and Drew noticed this too, and they called around in a panic, "Zak! Zak! Where are you?"

A call of "Mom! Over here! Hurry up!" followed, and turning to the sound of Zak's voice, they found that both Harry and Zak were standing in front of the wand shop.

"What's taking so long? Come on, guys, hurry up!" he yelled.

The adults just laughed and followed him.

* * *

Harry looked amazed at the dusty old store. Actually, everyone but Hagrid was amazed by the store, if only for sheer oldness.

They were also slightly startled by a sudden, "I've been expecting you, Harry."

Everyone turned around to see Ollivander, standing behind them in all his eccentric glory. He actually looked quite a bit like Dumbledore, as far as it went with being brilliant and completely insane at the same time.

Ollivander proceeded to talk about Harry's parents and how they had such special wands, completely missing Zak and his family (including the cryptids) in his excitement. When he was finally done talking to Harry and Hagrid, helping Harry find his wand, and explaining the strangeness of Harry's wand to them, Ollivander finally turned to Zak.

"Now, I assume you're here for a wand, too?" he said.

"Totally!" Zak exclaimed. "Hurry up and set me up with one!"

"Zak!"

"Please?" he added belatedly.

Ollivander just smiled. "Oh, there's no problem, Mrs. Saturday. Its refreshing to see the kids so excited about their wands, is it not?"

She just sighed. "I guess…"

Ollivander proceeded rummage through the stacks for a wand, while the magic tape measure floated around Zak.

"Ok, I have one here, Mr. Saturday. It's Birch, 9 and ½ inches, and has its core is a unicorn hair. Give it a wave."

Zak waved the wand. The tip glowed faintly gold, and then the light died.

"Hmm. There's a reaction, but its not quite right. Here, try this one. This one is oak, 10 inches, and has a dragon heartstring as its core."

Zak waved the wand again, hoping for a bigger reaction. It was bigger. Slightly.

"No, no. Close, but not quite. Here, try again" he said, holding out a different wand.

Zak tried again. And again. And again. Each and every wand had about the same reaction. Faint gold glowing, and then nothing. Ollivander was ecstatic.

"Ah, you are quite a special one, aren't you, Mr. Saturday."

Zak just blinked. He was getting frustrated, and he couldn't see how this was unusual. "What do you mean?"

Ollivander continued. "You are unusual because you have had a reaction with every single wand. Most people only resonate with a few wands in their lifetime. However, I'm actually fairly confident that you could use every one of these wands efficiently, even though it has never been heard of before. Ve~ry curious."

He held out another wand. "Try this one."

* * *

"Oh my gosh, that took so long!" Zak complained. He was holding his new wand, which was definitely the one for him. It was a fairly long 12 inch wand, made of wood from an aspen tree, and it had the core of unicorn tail.

The reason he knew it was his wand? Well, its reaction to him was slightly different. First, it trailed golden sparks everywhere. Then, every single wand in the store, including Harry's wand and Hagrid's umbrella, began to glow with a fairly weak glow. While all of this was happening, Zak's wand itself was glowing with a violent intensity.

People had stared in shock afterwards, and some passing witches peered in through the windows to see what was going on, so Doc hastily paid for the wand while Drew led Zak out of the store, back to the airship.

Now, they were back in the airship, talking about the magical world they walked into. The conversation had mostly been debate on whether or not it would be safe for Zak to be in the magic school, and whether or not the magical people would try to hunt him down, but then Zak suddenly asked, "Hey, Dad? What's the symbolism for the aspen tree?"

"Well, why do you want to know, son?"

Zak sat up. "Well, since the wand is connected to me, I want to know why it is. Don't you think there's some symbolism here? Maybe, since it's a magic wand, it chose me based on my personality, or my power."

"And by knowing what your wand represents, we can learn more about Kur!" Drew exclaimed. "Brilliant, Zak!"

"Ok." Doc said, searching the internet. "According to this site, the aspen tree is supposed to represent determination and overcoming fear and doubt."

"Yes!" Zak cheered. "I'm not evil!"

* * *

Ok, I am aware of the fact that the ending was very dorky, but I just had to add that. I have absolutely no idea why I had to, but I did. And for those who think dragon's heartstring would be more acceptable, I figured that since dragons are portrayed as harsh and violent, while unicorns represent purity, it would be better in showing that Zak is in fact, not an evil monster bent on destroying humankind. 


End file.
